Compare This Pain

April 26, 2012
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The dark coal eyes locked with mine.
I wiped my tears,
Pretending I was fine.
The man then said to me,
"Dear, why must you cry?"
Looking down,
I slowly responded "He is no longer by my side"
I felt a sense of shame
in which i could not hide.
He then said, "Make a deal with me for a better life"
We were now face to face.
He pulled from his jacket a contract with vengeful grace.
I replied, "Any reason to rid this pain"
I grabbed the needle from his hand.
With a single prick, I left my stain.
The shadows began to wrap around me
pulled from me, my soul
My body tried to flee.
My feet would not go.
The sensation stabbed me 1,000 times
as my eyes watched the flames glow.
Death began to rip and tear.
I made my choice
but compare this pain to losing you;
It is still easier to bare.

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Basketball23 said...
May 1, 2012 at 2:22 pm

I really enjoyed this.  The last line really emphasized what you were trying to get across.  I thought it was a great poem and excellent word choice.


*On a side note, hahaha I LOVE the picture with it ;)

AVERAGE replied...
May 2, 2012 at 10:18 am
ha thank u ;).... thanks for the thoughts i wasnt really sure if it all came together well
Basketball23 replied...
May 2, 2012 at 4:19 pm

No, it definitely came together very well :)


Oh, and just so you know, I get an email every time you post something so that's why I normally respond right away when it's accepted.

AVERAGE replied...
May 3, 2012 at 11:17 am
aww thats so awesome so u really like my work :) :)
Basketball23 replied...
May 3, 2012 at 4:08 pm
I LOVE YOUR WORK!!! <3  You're an amazing writer!
AVERAGE said...
May 1, 2012 at 10:14 am
my computer was messing up and somehow posted that picture -_-
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