Yet another goodbye

April 12, 2012
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this place is like a closet and
it couldn't get any smaller
and your stares couldn't cut any deeper,
knives that they are. what did I
do to deserve this, to earn this, to
make us go so wrong? how did I sink the ship,
burn down the forest, flood the town?
I tried, I tried, I tried, I gave you my soul
on a silver platter and my love as the second
course. I thought we'd be the ones that beat the odds,
the ones that still call each other once every
week and ask how life is. I wanted to be the one crying at
your wedding because I knew he was the one for you,
and I was going to be your daughter's godmother.
I was supposed to be the one you would lean on
and I was going to love you until the day I died.
I guess it doesn't mean anything anymore,
it doesn't matter that I've always been here,
that I always love you, even when I don't say it.
I will still leave the back door unlocked, some oreos
in the cookie jar, and 1% milk in the fridge,
just in case you ever show up out of blue.
because you were my best friend forever,
and I'd like to think that forever might still
exist somewhere up in that starry sky.

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