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vending machine guy

"Hi. nice to meet you
my name is Eric
you should hire me cuz im probably right for the job
Im good with numbers, I know
the names of all 12 months, backwards.
I know a lot about soda and different brands of beverages.
My favorite is Mr. Pibb.
I won't steal from your company,
I promise. I don't even like soda.
I'm pretty chill if you wanna hangout.
I really badly want to stock vending machines.
I stock my own fridge and all of my friends', all the time.
Please give me the job.
Give me the job.
If you don't, I'll kill you."

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