For Now

March 21, 2012
I look at you,
and I start to think,
my mind is blown,
and i am on the brink,
of losing myself,
who I have always been,
a forward mover,
now afraid to stand,
who am I?
What have I become?
can it really be,
that this life is the one?
I was not supposed to be here,
my life is way off course,
I should be ahead by now,
now falling due to force,
I was always headstrong,
and refused to sit back,
now I have to follow rules,
and it's hard to stay on track,
you act like there's no problem,
like you love me for who I am,
the truth is you can't stand me,
you settle for where I stand,
you don't think you can be happy,
think you'll never find someone else,
so you try to hold on to me,
and begin to lose yourself,
this is not the life you want,
and definitely not what you need,
I am just saying this,
in hopes that you will see,
you need to get away from me,
and find a better way to live,
that is what's best for both of us,
if we ever hope to win,
I can not force you,
and can not let you down,
so I am holding on,
living with this for now...

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