A Profound Suffering

March 15, 2012
By Anonymous

When I close my eyes


fear
is written in careful cursive
on the back of my eyelids.


Bitterness
is crudely engraved
into my brain.

And

pain
has left an angry scar
on my

tattered,
shattered,

scattered


heart.

I search the depths of my soul and find

nothing.

But the cold blackness kept there
to illuminate

the graffitied messages of hate
in the corners

where only the slyest of hands could’ve reached
with their razor blades

and pray paint.

Acid tears burn
bright red streaks

down my flushed cheeks,

A proclamation
of the sorrow

dwelling
behind the ghost
of a smile
that haunts
my once happy face.

I close my eyes
to stop the tears,

and find fear,
but still the tears fall
down like rain.
Like the storm inside my brain.

Love
is a distant memory.

Lust
is the shadow of a dream.

Hope
is crushed like the ice at the bottom of my half-empty glass.

This has all just been a beautiful description,
of the ugliest of affairs.

But it all comes down to this:

When I’m gone-
just another name on a grave,
don’t forget to remember me.
that is my simplest of pleas.
Just please don’t forget to remember me.

The author's comments:
I wrote this poem, originally as a diary entry. The raw version probably could've had me thrown into a mental institute for how suicidal it sounded. I can promise you i'm not suicidal, but at the time i was going through a lot and feeling kinda hopeless. It's been edited, rewritten, thrown away, and started again, and this is what i have now.

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