Then and Now

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They say: when you look into someone’s eye,
You can see their soul.
Maybe that’s why I can’t gaze into anyone’s eye.
If I did, they would surely run away.
My life is a tornado, destroying everything in its path.

My life was once social status, gossip,
Who’s dating who, and who’s fighting who.
Now it’s only isolation and fear.

I only kept close friends and
the only thing to comfort me,
Was knowing that I was, in reality,
Unlike the person I used to be.
I used to hide behind a mask,
Pretending to be someone I wasn’t.
I used to use people for my own purposes,
But now I treasure my friends
like a bear protects its cubs.

I feel like I’ve changed into a better person,
And yet I still question my decisions.
My life is a raindrop, fragile and ready to burst at any second.
I say I treasure my friends and yet I tell them nothing of my life.
What is the point in having friends then?
What’s the point in having people you trust,
When you don’t even tell them your secrets?

But then again,
you have friends so that when you do decide to tell them,
They’ll be there for you.
You have friends so that when you have no one to turn to,
You have them.
The people you trust.





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