These Tears I Cry

March 20, 2012
No one can turn back the clock of time, no one can go back to the past to prevent things from happening, no one can save those who have already passed on…but now, everyone seems to forget everything that has happened…

I was never broken, I was never whole, I was shattered into a million pieces, my heart unable to be fixed once more…but now the time has come for me to chose: to be stuck in the past in that time, or to somehow move on and remember them for who they were? My time is soon ending, for I can feel the darkness close in on me, suffocating me and dragging me down into the black abyss, unable to be free again

Everything that I have known, everything that I have believed in, must have all been lies to get me to be strong and my own person, but no one can see these tears I cry underneath this mask of happiness…I believed people when they said everything was going to be alright, but it was a lie…I believed people when they said they would help me through this pain, but no one was there when I needed them. I was being fed lies and everything I have known is now crumbling around me…

My loyalties are being divided and now these tears I cry are the only thing I have left to keep me going…I will only cry in the darkness, when my scars show, both emotional and physical…though no one knows how I go them, I will never be happy again

These tears I cry help me make it through the day, and everything that I once knew was only a waste, and some things that were once lost, can never be found again…some things that were found can easily be lost once again…

I am lost, forever lost, never to be found in the darkness of my own heart…I hold the Light and Darkness of my heart, yet the Light is soon going to be gone, will wither away and all that is left of me is Darkness…a tainted soul, not pure, not dark, but in between…my spirit, soul, and heart will turn black…don’t think about saving me, for I is to late…

I thought I would be easier to admit to lie, then hide my emptiness and hurt inside, to be happy…but I soon found out that it is easier to cry then to smile…

These Tears I Cry are only the beginning of a tainted soul that can not go back to being whole…





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