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Deep Seeded Sadness
I sit here with thoughts of death and pain,
The racing thoughts go through my mind and drive me insane.
I feel that its over, and I’m done,
I don’t care anymore and the devil has won.
I am giving up for I have no hope, sanguinity, or optimism to keep me on track,
I’m hurt because some of my friends have turned on me and stabbed me in the back.
I have no life, felicity, or love to give,
I’m an apathetic soul that doesn’t deserve to live.
I want to die; I want to end this deplorable life,
Because every second, of every minute, of every day, I feel nothing but strife.
People have tried to help me but nothing has worked,
I have now lost hope in everything, and my coping skills I have shirked.
Leave me to suffer in the agonizing pain I experience each day,
For this pain shall never and will never go away.
I cut to forget the mental stressors that cause me woe,
I sleep to escape the pain, but I wake each morning in tears upon the c***’s crow.
Powerless, infuriated, apathetic, and despondent are words to describe my inhibitions,
These feeling are what are bothering me and causing me to not making the volitions.
Life has lost its desirable charm,
Which is another reason for the scars upon my arm.
I grieve, I lament, and I weep,
For the ache in my lonely heart is oh so deep.
Not a woman in the world will ever love me, because of my troubled heart and ugly façade.
For women look at me like I am strange or odd.
If I died in this moment not one person would care,
This is the fact that troubles me the most and I just cannot bear.
I am like a ghost among many,
This verifies that my life is not even worth a penny.
I just want to feel loved, felicitous, and wanted,
But that will never happen because I have became daunted.
My deep seeded sadness corrupts my empathetic heart,
And now my life has officially fallen apart.