My Ideal Spouse

February 23, 2012
In some way, everybody wants to find their ‘soulmate.’ You know, the person who makes you smile just thinking about them, and even when they make mistakes, you can’t find it anywhere in you to actually be mad at them. The ones who give you a reason to get out of bed, and to keep going in life. Well, here is my vision of a perfect spouse.
First of all, looks don’t really matter to me—I mean, no man could ever be as good looking as I am, so it’s not really something to worry about. But I don’t want some scrub off the streets that smells like dirt and old eggs, and has a six foot long beard. In the long run, I want someone who doesn’t disgust me. They don’t have to be flawless, just not disgusting.
For me, personality means everything. The biggest thing is they have to be funny. They have to be able to make me laugh at any moment of the day, because it could solve anything. Whenever I’m sad, the only thing that can really cheer me up is making me laugh and smile. I love people with a good sense of humor, because it takes a good one to understand all my sarcasm. I can’t stand people who can’t take jokes, or takes every piece of advice as me ripping on them, so they need to understand.
I also want someone who wants to spend time with me. I absolutely hate being alone, so they need to want to spend time with me. I love being with people, because I am a very social person. So, even if it is just watching movies everyday, I want someone to spend time with me.

He has to be good with people. I don’t want to carry around some awkward person who shies away from everyone we see. I’m the kind of person who likes to stand on tables and yell things like, “I had spaghettio’s for breakfast!” Just to make my presence known. If he can’t deal with my high energy, he can’t deal with me. Obviously. I don’t care if he’s not as wound up as I am, but he has to do something. I don’t want somebody who just lays around all day and night. I am WAY to high energy for that.

This man needs to be smart. I’m not dealing with somebody if they don’t know basic math, or ‘typs lyke dis al da tyme.’ It obviously makes you look dumb, and makes people wish you were born in a different country. You need to be able to understand general knowledge, and not look at me blankly whenever I say something remotely smart.

In the long run, I don’t want to much from a man. Just to have normal social skills, general knowledge, and a great personality. I’m pretty sure the right guy for me is out there, and I have a good feeling I’ve already found him.

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