February 6, 2012
I know he is behind me,
He is walking as fast as I am.
I look back and he is only a few feet behind me,
His face pale with black hair,
While in a black cape that’s flapping in the wind.
I start with a sprint and I hear him creeping up on me,
My legs start to tremble,
My stomach is filled with butterflies,
My eyes start to water,
He makes me feel like collapsing.
He is breathing down my back,
He is telling me to be afraid.
I can no longer stand up to him,
I start to slow down and let him over come me.
Everything is getting darker and,
Finally its over.

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This article has 7 comments. Post your own now!

-Ash- said...
Feb. 10, 2012 at 12:47 pm
it was good, but i agree that you could have worked on building up him so he is even more creepy. but it was still creepy and a really cool poem! :)
11swimer4life replied...
Feb. 11, 2012 at 1:26 am
the man was suppost to be all in my mind, i dont want him to be extra creepy
Purplefilly said...
Feb. 10, 2012 at 1:45 am
I enjoyed this, but I feel like you could have built "him" up a little bit more; made "him" more creepy (which the person was!). I love it though!! :)
11swimer4life replied...
Feb. 11, 2012 at 1:27 am
I didnt really want "him" to be the main factor of the poem, it was supost to be all in my head but thanks :)
11swimer4life said...
Feb. 8, 2012 at 7:55 pm
hey if u can leave a comment that would be greattttttt!!!
Toran replied...
Feb. 9, 2012 at 8:43 am
Whoa. I think my heart skipped a beat. Great job.
11swimer4life replied...
Feb. 9, 2012 at 8:47 am
Haha thanks! I was going for creepy and almost bone chilling effect when people read this! Thanks for commenting
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