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Beads

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My whole family was brought together,
For all the wrong reasons.
I sat in the silenced car, watching for the right exit signs.
My sister’s hands shaking as we drove down the long,
Dreading roads and around the huge, hilly mountains.
The heartbreaking feeling I felt, as I watched tears drip
Down my sister’s cheeks, messing up her beautifully
Done mascara.
The saddened time had brought laughter, and love,
But also guilt and sorrow
My aunt’s funeral was bittersweet.

The floor cracked and squeaked
As I walked in my uncles old, worn down country styled home
That dusted two bedroom house
The smell of sweet biscuits and gravy called my name
As I shifted to the oak dining table
I saw my older cousin with a million beads,
and curiosity stepped into the room
Martigras, she said.

As she covered the table with beaded necklaces’, she told her story.
About how drunk, ignorant old men would stumble around town
With there whiskey in hand
About how the lights lit the city up like fireworks on Fourth of July
About how girls would walk around half naked with beads covering themselves.

As I listened to her memory, I felt like I lived it
I felt like I was there seeing all the lights, observing the people she saw
I felt like I was the one collecting those beads
I felt like I was her.

She allowed me to have a couple of necklaces,
And as I sifted and pick through the beads, one had caught my eye.
A necklace with beads the size of marbles, colored a violet purple,
Sparked with crystal clear sparkles.
When I picked up that one necklace, it waved with confidence.











This necklace was special. This necklace is what I would hold on to forever
To remember her memory, and some day actually live it
To feel the happiness she felt when she was there; free.

My aunt’s funeral was the next day,
I dreaded this day, I hated this day, and I wished this day away,
But it was time to say goodbye, not only to my aunt,
But to my family, it would be a couple of years until I see them again.


Ill never forget that time going down south.
All the laughter, smiles, tears, and sadness
That we had experienced together
To this day, those martigras beads remind me of the family I have
Those martigras beads begged me to put them on, and explore the world with freedom
Those martigras beads remind me of the moments I am yet to live.





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