I can't sleep, my dreams only make it worse.
Can't get those faces out of my head.
The tears I cried, the hurtful words they said are burned into my memory.
I tried so hard to make you proud.
I apologize for being such a shame, guess I'll always be second best.
How do I compete with the dead?
Just tell me what to do, I'll do whatever you want just to stop the hurt.
Yes, I'm the freak, I keep my head down and hope no one notices.
The help they try to give only makes things worse on you so I promise to keep them away.
You use to sing me to sleep when I was scared.
You use to love and care about me.
Remember when you use to bandage me up when I got hurt?
Do you see the pain you put me through?
I know you say the cuts, bruises, and scars you leave on me are punishment for what I did, but do you see that enough is enough?
That was then, this is now.
Once again I'm sorry I couldn't be the child you have always wanted but I can't take it anymore.
Maybe once I'm gone you will stop hurting, maybe it was my presence that made it so difficult all these years.
So here I go on my own, I swear to you I won't turn back.
Even though life was hell you taught me how to keep myself alive even in the worst situations, so I must thank you for that.
Without you I'll be everything I couldn't be with you.
And when I get a little afraid I'll just sing myself to sleep.