Music and Paper

December 30, 2011
There's this girl
She's sitting in the stairway, dark and alone
With only music to tame her soul.
Upstairs her family fights, yet again
Her fault
Thinking and dreaming
Not always good.
Skin screaming for the release
Yearning for the comfort of death
But death never comes
Knowing she's not worthy
Knowing she doesn't deserve the comfort.
She knows she's a burden, worthless
Having only music and paper
To hear her out,
Deserving nothing
Hating herself.
Hating her smile, body face, and mind
Having no soul to speak of
Why shouldn't everyone give up on her?
Her family figured it out
She figured it out
But her friends haven't,
No one can save her.
Everyone gives up eventually
Nothing lasts
No use trying,
The flame in her is dying
But they haven't yet,
Why haven't they yet?
All the little things they do
Keep her going
Keep her sane
Things they don't realize
Mean the most to her.
Her family is dead to her
World War Three breaking out every night
Coming home to fight
Wanting something more.
Her friends become her family, home
Getting her to smile
Keeping her from giving up,
But she knows she doesn't deserve it.
She doesn't deserve to smile, be happy, be heard
She deserves nothing
Not friends, family a home,
Not life, the air she breathes,
And not the comfort of death.
She yearns to be understood, accepted
Knowing she doesn't deserve it
Knowing that everyone gives up eventually
Knowing nothing ever lasts,
So why even bother?
'Cause the only things that last forever
Is her music, pens, and paper.





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