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Unexplainable

Straight to the bottom of the pit is where my dark soul resides

Not even a shadow to hold its company

Just the demons surrounding

Pulling on my arms to their caves

My life is being controlled by the centuries of sins

And held down...

Held down by the cold chains

My smile has been deleted from this image

The tears flowing from my heart are never ending

And the piercing crying

From my soul

Hideous

The danger my eyes see everyday cannot even begin to stand in comparison to the dangers my mind figures

The cuts

The tears

The false smiles

The whispers

Are what is destroying me

I'm past that state of help

Or state of reaching for help

All I want is the death of my existence

Only way I see to escape this pain

Demons pulling me to and fro'

And their chuckles are just the smallest percent of what haunts me

These sins and all I am ashamed

Etched into my flesh

Where all can stare at them

My head spinning is the affect of their stares

The words just so loud

And screaming inside my head brings me to my breaking point of my shaking knees falling

And the tears of my heart become visible to the human

And my doors are left open for strangers to walk in

Feel at home

I guess

Go right ahead

My body is their scratch paper

Words are all the sends me to the boiling point

But, it's stronger than actions

The sticks and stones will never compare to the unstoppable track of insults thrown at my face

Their lips

Only image ever seen in my mind

My sanity has ran away

It was the only thing I had left of me

And now.... Now, what have I left?

My pride?

That always nonexistent

Destroyed within the moment they caught a first glimpse

My joy?

It was killed with the pride

Yet, I'm sure of their location;

A cold dungeon in a land too far for the eye to see

And they'll never return home

Their present location most likely safer than my mind

My mind is ripped apart

Just destroyed

I wanna see the bright light

The bright light the personal demons converse of

I have the tempting to eavesdrop

What I gain knowledge of:

A.... A Savior

Can bring the broken salvation?

This isn't where I want to be a permanent resident

He has abundant love?

Care

Grace

Power

Empathy

I want this man they speak of in their hushed tones

Can they know of my worth

Their smirks are filled with His name

And dare not they touch him

Into dust they'd possibly turn

The pressure I had anticipated

Much less

I'm reaching

Reaching

I'm crying out

You're what I need

Right here and now

I open my heart

My mind

My soul

With every ounce of strength I hold

I'm presenting myself before you

Empty

Fill me

Make me whole

Stitch my wounds

Sew my broken scars

Just what I'm wanting

My aim is just a lift off

But, You are my stronghold, Lord

Perfection, You are

My tower

My strength

My all

In you, I put my trust

You're like a tiny flower blossoming within me

Opening my life

My tears are dried and wiped away

And my pride

Not even mine

Yours

You're my pride

My hope is You

Everything I am is in You

You've filled me

Filled me to the rim

And only if I could ever repay you?

An impossible achievement

But, I can still strive for it

Guarantee to be achieved?

No

But, You are my God

Never-ending worship for you

What you deserve

And my goal

Just because You made my heart beat again

The meaning is much deeper than this ink I've left behind

My soul

Safely returned to my body

But, I..

I don't know

My mind has the hardest time comprehending you

And I'll never understand it

Just trusting in you

Believing in you

Is only scratching the surface

The faith and joy my soul has now encountered

Unexplainable

That's what all of this is...

Unexplainable





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