According to Her

December 25, 2011
According to her,
we aren't even supposed to speak.
She belives,
I should go about my day,
forgetting more and more about you.
But truthfully,
I dont WANT to forget you.
I like those memories,
replaying inside my head.
I know you dont deserve me.
I know you dont care,
about the gentle forgiveness
I offered you.
Somedays I cry,
cause I'm sick of you.
Ripping my heart out,
and stepping on it again,
and again.
All because of her.
You cant kiss me like you used to.
You cant hold my hand,
and tell me everything
will be alright when I'm scared.
No more running your fingers,
through my hair,
when we'd lay together.
I feel like it was all a lie,
or a dream.
The way you'd smother me in compliments.
I loved it.
The way we'd hold our faces so close together,
just looking into each others eyes and laugh,
I miss it.
When I cry about you,
I feel like my tears belong to you.
along with my heart.
I can't help myself,
from stumbling upon people like you.
Because of her,
I feel like sometimes,
you cant even look at me.
I still get some cute texts.
Saying how,
undescribingly beautiful,
my eyes are.
In a way..
I'm too used to getting who I want.
I never give up on something I really like.
Everytime I see you,
I noticen more aboout you, taking it all in.
Then I feel like,
Im falling deeper,
and deeper,
into something that will be even harder to get out of.
One time,
I believe you just,
wanted to make me jealous,
when you told me
you thought that new girl was
I felt like giving up after that.
I felt like I was done trying.
So one day,
if you ask me what my feelings are about you.
I'd read you this poem and pour my heart out to you<3

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