Without You

November 24, 2011
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Without you I'm scared.
Without you I feel bare.
Without you there are tears.
And without you there's always fears.
Sometimes I ache,
And sometimes I just want a break.
Without you I am weak,
like I've gone beyond the peak.
Without you I just want to cry,
and I always have sad, sad, eyes.
Though I never got to meet you, I miss you.... I really do.
I want you to know that me feelings are true.
And forever and ever I will think of you.

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This article has 10 comments. Post your own now!

Mrs.LOver said...
Dec. 25, 2011 at 10:21 pm
wow its a great poem for ur first one i loved it and im sorry about ur brother
WaffleManThing said...
Dec. 13, 2011 at 8:58 pm
awsome, i liked it
Acastillo said...
Dec. 11, 2011 at 7:49 pm
It was really beautiful, I really liked it.
UNserieswriter said...
Dec. 11, 2011 at 12:36 pm
although poetry doesnt have to, i love when they rhyme lol. Is there anything else you want viewed? i'd love your opinion on The Underground Network (chapter 15 because it's the strongest part) and Roman Leagues if you can spare the time. Can't wait to hear from you, thanks!
youngspeare said...
Dec. 11, 2011 at 5:51 am
i'm defintely liking your style and of course this piece! fanatastic job, do keep writing :) 
Please check out my poem "Ghosts of the Past" and rate/comment? Would really appreciate it!
LassieBob said...
Dec. 10, 2011 at 11:14 pm

For this being a first poem, I've gotta say- Great! The emotion is there, although slightly hidden... Which adds to the mystery within this poem. The rhymes add something to it that I can't really describe, but I like it! =]


The only thing I could suggest would be working on your flow. It was slightly choppy, although this could simply be part of your style. Keep it up!

CarrieAnn13 said...
Dec. 10, 2011 at 9:59 pm
Beautiful poem!  I'm so sorry that this happened to you, but I think this is a beautiful tribute.  I appreciate the punctuation in your writing, since most people don't bother with it in free-verse poetry.  Excellent work!
ags_586 said...
Dec. 10, 2011 at 9:51 pm

nice poem, i have been through something recently, that has put me through exactly what this poem describes.

keep writting!!

FishboytheWriter said...
Nov. 29, 2011 at 8:42 pm


I love this poem. Your feelings shine through it and give the words life. Keep on writing. =)

ChocoMint said...
Nov. 29, 2011 at 8:15 pm
I loved the way the words and emotion flowed in it. My only suggestion would be to break up the line after "...never got to meet you" then make "I miss you...I really do" a completely different line. But that's just my personal preferance. Great job for your first time on poetry!!! Could you check out one of my poems please? <><
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