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Death Is...

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Sometimes this world is too much.

It's too hard for you to bare,

When it pulses, pushes, you around in a rush.

And a knife's shining edges are a taunting dare.


Woe to the one who caves.

Woe to the ones insane.

And I know who's done this deed.

The ones who think only of their own needs.

Woe to the lost and weary.

Woe to the most who fear me.

And I know who's spread these words,

The ones who cannot trust now that they've been hurt.


My name is death, and they're wrong to fear me.

I'm their only escape from the evil in these cities.

I'm the only chance of justice for the wicked

And the only one who knows who to get rid of.



The real death you humans die,

Is living in this world, 'cause it's living a lie.

The real death is waiting just around the corner in the alley,

Your own savage kind, not me.



Woe to the ones who give in.

Woe to the ones who won't win.

Woe to the ones who burn.

Woe be to this World....



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This article has 3 comments. Post your own!

TouchOfARose said...
Jan. 5, 2012 at 11:40 am:
No, don't worry about being critical! I really appreciate the advice, and I think I'll take that more into consideration in my future pieces. And I will definitely check out your work! Thanks. (:
 
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GreenSerenity said...
Jan. 4, 2012 at 8:42 pm:
I agree with BrokenBree about the last stanza being the best. It's short yet powerful. The rest of the poem is good too, don't get me wrong, but it feels like it's missing something. Maybe a few more descriptive words could spice it up a bit? I think it gets a little bit repetitive, which is fine, as long as you find a way to keep the reader interested. Sorry if I sound overly critical--just trying to help :) By the way, I'd love it if you'd check out my piece called 12 Color Haiku :)
 
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BrokenBreeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Nov. 20, 2011 at 12:30 pm:
I love the last stanza the most. Amazing<3
 
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