Out Here

Looks like I found my self,
on the outside again,
my body exposed to the elements,
the rain and snow beating upon my skin,
the sun drying my face,
the wind blowing it all together at once,
make it all one thing.
I turn,
and my fingers rest upon the window,
my elbow leans on the window frame,
I left my head and I peak into,
the home that I thought I was just in,
the home I was just kicked out of.
I see every one's smiling faces,
I hear everyone's laughter,
I see everyone's smiles as they eat the sweets,
and I want to be part of that again,
Its all I ever wanted to be apart of,
its all I never got to be apart of,
for some reasons its still I what I want to be apart of.
I raise my hand,
and turn my head,
I can't look into the window anymore,
and wonder at who I am,
wonder why I cant be in the home,
wonder why I cant be welcomed in?
Am I really so different,
from all of you on the inside,
do I really stick out,
from all of you on the inside,
don't you see how badly I want in,
to not have to be out here?
But out here is my only friend,
I only have out here,
I only have the rain and snow,
that wet my skin,
the sun,
that dries my head,
and the wind,
the wind that brings it all together.
All I have is myself,
All I have is the ability to look,
on the inside,
and wonder why,
I am out here,
instead of in there where I want to be.





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