Tears cascade from my eyes
Every time I think of you
And how you aren't in my life anymore.
People question my insecurities,
The reasons why I don't trust easily,
and their questioning glances slide my way
When I come back from lunch alone.
The times I do explain it,
When I reveal our story
They grow pitifully silent,
As though the mention of your name
Will somehow re open my wounds.
Smiling helps to fool them.
False happiness seems to keep people content;
Believing the outward appearance
Can run through to the core.
When the charades cease,
Those moments at night when I lay awake
Remembering what it was like
To still love you,
That's when the tears cascade from my eyes.
Carrying me into an unwelcoming slumber
And forcing me to ask myself
A rhetorical question.
Why did you leave me
Mom?