It's not fair that we were born this way.
It just brings a loss of words for us to say.
Can't even start something that feels so right.
I can't even argue, put up a convincing fight.
I just ramble on hoping for a shot in the dark.
To where you reconsider, just even lark.
This all seems so unbelieving.
Love now seems so deceiving.
Because now it's f***ed me with me variously.
Seduced me into situations precariously.
I find a beautiful, intelligent, woman I could love.
Then she has to fly away like a bewailing dove.
We even like each other strongly and get along well.
But we have to deny our own feelings, for Allah, we dwell.
Fatalism now seems like a philosophy of lifelong depression.
Instead of a sense of idealism, now it's just a progression.
To my last seconds when I flash back of all my life's moments.
I'll always look at that cursed bench...and think of love's torments.
You seem like a fantasy girl, in my perfect fantasy world.
But then I'm back on this planet, in fetal position all curled.
I couldn't even look at you without thinking of past happiness.
And it's a torture that brings back moments I'll forever miss.
That Saturday was all that I needed to feel my stomach flutter.
Then within five days, once again, it was all in the gutter.
I don't have strength to control myself from sounding desperate.
But it's hard when happiness and I just feel so seperate.
Wake me up in the middle of the night with words of hope.
But that's just me dreaming again, this life is just stringy rope.
Waiting to snap on me always now again.
Right when progress made, it snaps in ten.
I don't even have the will to leave this bed.
So these are some words, I have not left unsaid.
I always wonder why I am stuck on this side of the road.
The side of secret blue emotions, always in depressive mode.
I just want to feel your heart just like I did yesterday.
But I invest in you in one weekend, and I pay.
Put your hands all over me,
Wrap your eyes to see me Mr. Lee.
You're cuter then a button,
But I can't get the sweatshirt.
I just get to see your alluring price tag.
I've been searching for your touch,
Unlike any touch I have ever known.
But now I sit in this hell of a room.
And ironically, the only thing I want to hear is your voice...
Knowing that it wasn't even your own choice...