Have you ever?

October 6, 2011
Have you ever wanted something so badly that every fiber of your being stood on end as if electrified? And every nerve in your body burned of yearning? Never could "want" accurately describe the dehydration that parched your desiccated soul.
It was "acute need"
to the point of self-destruction.
So you fell down on the hard floor,
and you lay writhing uncontrollably,
desperately.
You shut your eyes so that your brows furrowed
and the wrinkles of your forehead bore inwards. Hysterically you thrashed your arms,
banged your head, kicked, shrieked.
But the anguish and convulsions that seized your frame would not stop,
could not stop while your mind was hazed
with the derangement of need.
You punched, scratched, clawed, just to feel,
just because you felt rage and numbness simultaneously.
And as the raging spasm subsided,
as the screaming stopped, a new quake overwhelmed your bruised and aching muscles. Realization sunk deep
in the marrow of your bones,
and your soul felt raw,
alone, and empty.
The deluge of salty tears spilled, stinging
the wounds of woe.
To fill the emptiness, you glutted yourself with the superficial.
But your soul was still desensitized, benumbed to past pleasures
that became nothing
because of extended deprivation.
False consolation, artificial sympathy
from stupid sheep
was the only source of an infinitesimal flicker of passion.
Time passed, as evident by physical change;
but your sad soul was eternally frozen
in the lifeless leftovers of "acute need."
You couldn't live-
if living was without him.





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