Lost on the Surface | Teen Ink

Lost on the Surface MAG

February 24, 2008
By Jouna Jedrichailes, Palm Bay, FL

I was lost in the middle of your palm
etched with deep lines
intersecting like busy highways
and my way of feeling satisfied was by
running laps around the
shape of your lips
and eyelids
finding my way through the
twists and turns of your clasped hands
as words lingered in your throat
I rode a boat through your tear ducts
explored what getting “lifted” really was by
playing with the rough
strands of your hair
I breathed in your air
ricocheted off your skin and found myself back in
the guidance of your feet leading me to your
parallel universe
created
to make me elated as I explored your outer walls
since the surface of your affection was the farthest I ever got



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This article has 27 comments.


lonleysymone said...
on Oct. 18 2011 at 8:58 pm
lonleysymone, Bolingbrook, Illinois
0 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
Moving on, is a simple thing, what it leaves behind is hard

i loved it!! how u explained everything with the simple things.. it made it seem really modest♥

on Mar. 18 2011 at 8:00 am
BitterSweet1993 SILVER, Bronx, New York
5 articles 0 photos 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species. ~W. Somerset Maugham, A Writer's Notebook, 1949

Amazing skills. I don't know If I would have been able to keep away from giving away the purpose of this poem. It's awesome!

Kiyoko GOLD said...
on Jan. 10 2011 at 1:08 pm
Kiyoko GOLD, Knoxville, Tennessee
10 articles 0 photos 43 comments

Favorite Quote:
Independence is my happiness, I view things as they are without regard to place or person. My country is the world, and my religion is to do good. - Thomas Paine

Nice! I like how you spend almost the whole poem explaining how you explored,  and then at the end you find out what it was all about. Excellent. If you have the time, I would appreciate it if you would read mine. Great Job!

dlav4 said...
on Dec. 8 2010 at 2:35 pm
This is a great poem

alexxeo GOLD said...
on Nov. 3 2010 at 9:48 pm
alexxeo GOLD, Saint Helens, Oregon
12 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Absence from the ones we love is self from self-- a deadly banishment." -William Shakespere

"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication." -Leonardo De Vinci

"Seduce my mind
...and speak those words to the point of
contradiction.
Hypocrisy never seemed so beautiful.
Your lips have it down to an
art. Oh, I know I'm in love with
wordplay.
Speak to me,
'til your lips are numb.
We'll always have pen and paper. " -By Anonymous, Mississauga, Canada

this is great! (: Please read mine:DD I love how you explain the exploration of his hands... Amazing(:

on Oct. 18 2010 at 10:06 am
Dessometrics BRONZE, Charleston, South Carolina
4 articles 0 photos 43 comments

Favorite Quote:
currently seeking

i love this

Photo_97 said...
on Oct. 15 2010 at 9:54 pm
Photo_97, Ct., Connecticut
0 articles 7 photos 65 comments
i really like this one. its deep and i like how it rolls off my tounge. im filled with envy :) keep it up!

kms777 GOLD said...
on Jun. 8 2010 at 5:49 pm
kms777 GOLD, Winn, Michigan
16 articles 0 photos 29 comments

Favorite Quote:
"learn from your mistakes but regret not a thing"

this is really deep and really meaningful!!!! i love it so much. the way you put your words makes everything seem magical. i hope youll read mine and give me some tips on how to make mine like that

on Feb. 9 2010 at 3:42 pm
Kaitlinsmiles BRONZE, Somewhere, Georgia
2 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"There are things known, and unknown. and in between, are the doors." -Jim Morrison

this is amazing.

Johnny Tran said...
on Aug. 3 2009 at 5:05 am
Johnny Tran, Lawrenceville, Georgia
0 articles 1 photo 1 comment
this poem is pretty meaningful,i like it

inferno said...
on Jun. 28 2009 at 12:04 pm
i loved it. it was deep and easy to understand. as every one said it is amazing and perfect

on Jun. 23 2009 at 3:28 pm
thedancingdoctor BRONZE, Dassel, Minnesota
4 articles 0 photos 22 comments
Amazing, beautiful, heart-wrenching. I love it.

madison17 said...
on Apr. 15 2009 at 1:07 am
this is amazing. i love it.

on Apr. 14 2009 at 9:01 pm
AndThisIsReal PLATINUM, Broadalbin, New York
31 articles 0 photos 81 comments

Favorite Quote:
Dans chaque fil il y a un debut.

This is hitting on a personal level at the moment.

So although it brings a meloncholy feeling, it was very nice.

Well written, creative, and true.

on Feb. 18 2009 at 1:45 am
SaveThEmpty SILVER, Rathbun, Iowa
9 articles 0 photos 16 comments
wow! this is amazing!

smejia said...
on Feb. 13 2009 at 2:39 pm
i think this poem is good i like it :)

jounajc said...
on Feb. 2 2009 at 1:50 am
thanks so much everybody!!! i didn't know i had this much great feedback. thanks again, i really truly appreciate it :]

KeYzToLoVe said...
on Jan. 20 2009 at 5:29 am
Thiz Waz reAllY DeeP And It MaDe Me ThinK...KeeP It Up

sponge said...
on Jan. 14 2009 at 8:05 pm
wow thats a good poem!

Jomodospike said...
on Dec. 9 2008 at 3:14 am
One of my favorite poems ever!!!


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