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I Wonder Always
I always imagined that after this trail,
After the hell,
After the path I never should have taken,
That my life would be different.
That I would finally have all things,
That I never could before,
Or that never lasted long enough,
And I wonder if I will get that there?
To get the chance to truly be her,
And live the life I always imagined,
That I would?
To finally tastes those things,
That were never offered to me,
Given to me,
Had by me.
I wonder if I will have it there.
I always figured that when the time came,
That I would have those things,
And I wonder if I will,
Or if I won’t.
I’ve seen others abuse,
Others have and have and have,
And never understand the meaning of them,
Or what it is like to be without them,
And I wonder if I will have it there.
Because this trail,
Is nearly over,
I can see the ending of the path,
And I wonder if I will finally have,
Those things previously imagined,
And only wanted.
For as they say,
These weren’t the best years of my life,
I will still come into those,
So I wonder if I will have those things there,
The things I have been missing,
Are they there waiting for me,
To find them,
And them me?