Inner Foes

August 22, 2011
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Outside they stand
Thousands of fans
With hearts tattooed on all their hands.

They shriek
They scream
They jump
They beam

They sing her songs
And wear her shirts,
They copy all
Her little quirks.

At night she sings
To them in millions
She sings of love and ache,
For when she’s with them
Her heart will not break.

She sings with feeling
False emotions
Wishing there were
Get well potions

If only they knew
She thinks they’d leave,
But when they know
They’ll only grieve.

For behind closed doors
No star is she
And out emerge
Her inner wars

Against her wrist
She drags a knife
And feels the pain
The pain of life.

She makes each cut
With frantic desire
The pain of disaster,
It burns like a fire.

Red oceans
Head spinning
Sharp motions
No winning
Depression.
She collapses on the floor.

If only they knew
She thinks they’d hate.
But when they know
Will come the faith.

For now, she sings aloud to all
And sees a girl against the wall
She meets her gaze and then she knows,
This girl too has inner foes.

So then she sings and stares and listens
And grabs the girl who never glistens
Pulls her on stage
Gives her a smile
Perhaps, she thinks,
My life’s worthwhile.

But when she is alone again
She treats her body as no friend.
She hates…
And hates…
And hates…
Until the day she barely wakes.

But off to sing she will then go
The teenaged star with inner foes.





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