August 18, 2011

Honey on my lips
Bitter on the back of my tongue- the taste of you
You calling to me in the grey light
Not now, not here,
Trying to pull me away, end this fight

The bruises on my feet
As I ran down a stone road, barefoot in my flight
Write this word again and again-
This long year, these long months,
This ending that never began

Poison words with your tears
Her screaming in the background
This time I’ll fall apart, my dear
Words word words your black words
Ripping wide open the scars, leaving me alone with my fears

This sick feeling in my stomach
Shaking of nervous hands
I know you still don’t get it now,
Why it’s not a joke, why it hurts too much to listen to you prod and poke
Too late, these silences you sowed

I ran away, I’ll walk today
Your face going blank as I pass by
Drowning in your sea of self-pity
Dark hole in my head, it’s not coming out right
Stop trying to make it so pretty

Cicada keen in the background
Screaming in my head
Never what I thought, batter, trade, I’m not something you bought
Shiny tears, I don’t have to understand you anymore
I will never, ever be, who you thought

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