Eaten

August 8, 2011
By Livvy97 GOLD, Warren, New Jersey
Livvy97 GOLD, Warren, New Jersey
17 articles 1 photo 26 comments

damp willows send a shadow over the house
that home sat by itself for so many years
loneliness still remains in its thick wooden door
soft leaves clash with the white chipping paint

it stays hidden deep in the forest where she commanded it
her wrinkly aged skin and hyena-like cackle sent my heart racing

one fatal choice was all it took
curiosity overcame me as my body moved
into the home I went
and I was the next Gretel eaten by the Gingerbread house


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This article has 2 comments.


Livvy97 GOLD said...
on Aug. 12 2011 at 3:39 pm
Livvy97 GOLD, Warren, New Jersey
17 articles 1 photo 26 comments
Thanks! I'll look at your suggestion!

on Aug. 12 2011 at 12:55 pm
HannSawyer15 BRONZE, North Brunswick, New Jersey
1 article 0 photos 108 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I say... lets speak it. Lets fight it. Lets write it. There's nothing to hold on to if it's already gone."

I liked this one. :) The only thing I would say is in the first stanza where you said "for so many years" maybe switch it to "for so long" ?? Your choice! But I love when you say "where she commanded it" :) Keep writing! :D


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