The Pause

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I find this moment hard to grasp, though harder to regard it.
As anything less than a battlefield, archers mark their targets.
A rendezvous of better days, a distant sailing ship.
A thimble in my side, I sit amidst prevailing bliss.
Though I am not here with intent, flaunting my mistakes.
A laugh that echoes in my dreams, I'm haunted by its grace.
My remedy is silence, my antidote, a mask.
My guilt, it has free access and I can't revoke its pass.
What was once a kingdom, now lays here broke and frayed.
The relic disappears and leaves my sky a smoking gray.

So here I stand before a crowd, for something not to celebrate.
A calming horror buries me, I'm numb as thoughts accelerate.
My presentation fakes reception, bearing the absurd.
A curse or gift, my balance is so carefully disturbed.
Memories avoid me, we don't see eye to eye.
I cant blend in too perfect, but at least I tried to try.
No, I do not relate, but I am one to pretend.
And my silence can't move forth, as the pause comes to an end.





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