July 26, 2011
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A broken lens
Or perception
The simplicity forgotten in neglecting
A broken image captured
Dead because Jesus never showed up in this rapture
Why can’t any lunar eclipse just be the apocalypse
This world needs anything more than a simple fix
But most stay focused on cocaine drips
But right now
I just need to slow down
I’m as funny as a crippled clown
Watch my mind escape while my body drowns
And as I emerge into this broken sound
I realize it’s all a ****ing joke
I broke the lens
And my mind continues to toke
Screw sobriety but I’m still clean
I don’t know what it all really means
If I can’t remain being a human being
What is this new world I’m seeing
I’m trying to escape reality when these words are spoken
It’s not problems I received but ones that were chosen
By myself
I need to have levels because I’m crying for help
I don’t know if this is pre-contemplation
Because that would put me one-year back and the time for thought is wasting
It appears that I’m just going to keep on procrastinating
Because for my life to begin, I actually am waiting
This can’t be real
A broken lens
It’s not mendable and this should be unforgettable
Because I neglect my soul and regret the toll
That I paid to be here
Forever indecisive, in the fetal position I fear
It’s destiny so what do I really care for
I can’t make it that much longer
I’m in pain because my craving for the bong hurts
But ****ing up would defeat the purpose of how much my mom works
To pay off our debt to Aspen
I’m stuck in a difficult position, I’m trapped in
A difficult situation, my personality’s color is losing saturation
I don’t even know if I’m at level 5, maintenance
So it starts again, this trend
That says I can’t be a true friend
To the world I’m a d*bag
And I would rather be on the streets wearing rags
Than be at home
Because the world is too tempting to try and continue to atone
For my mistakes
For staying up every night till 2 AM to get baked
For god’s sake
Why can’t the next lunar eclipse just be the real apocalypse
Because I need a better fix
And in death I can’t remember this
A broken lens
This life reprimands me
And just keeps on reminding me
That I will never be
Good enough

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