i guess the joke's on me

July 19, 2011
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you really have hurt me more than anyone else in this entire world

they were all right

we weren't going to really last

i was just too naive

to be realistic and believe the truth

i really thought i was going to one day be your wife

i really thought our love would never fall apart

never be broken

but it died

at least your love for me did,

because i am sitting here heart broken

and still in love with you

hoping maybe you will change your mind

but no use in waiting for something

that's not gonna happen

for someone who puts you last,

in their life,in their heart,and in their mind

is it so awful to say

that i wish i wasn't having your child

because i am going to have to be around you for the rest of my life

always thinking

what if,what if

what if he never stopped wanting me

wanted to be with me

what is so wrong with me

i need to stop this because everything will be okay

we just aren't meant to be

like we had originally thought

i thought us being together was God's fate

but i realize now

you are just a mistake that i am supposed to learn from

supposed to overcome

so i don't just give myself to someone so easily

don't believe the things they say to me

like they love me with all their heart

and that they are going to be mine forever

even though i know this

my tears just keep on coming

they won't subside

i feel the lowest that i ever have felt

my heart feels so torn i feel

like its just died

i feel like I've just been lied to

all this time

all this time that i came to love you more and more

and you just let it happen

why did you let this happen

why did i let myself keep on loving you this way

why did i

why did i

why did i

why did i let myself fall in love with you,Babe

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