You're forever stuck, I'm afraid.

July 11, 2011
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 I could wade out into the ocean waters and
get lost in the sound of the waves lapping
over one another. I could sit on my rooftop,
looking up at the stars that glow with a pure,
white light--breathtaking to behold.
I could stare into your eyes all day, forever
mesmerized. I could hold you while we watch
the sunset and laugh while we stare into each
others' eyes.
I could watch a lightning storm and cry as I
picture you with your camera, trying to get
off a dozen shots before the spectacular
night ends.
I could shake and tremble as I hear the rain
fall, screaming at the voice in my head telling
me you're long gone.
I could watch the video of you playing the
piano. And watch it over and over again,
crying until the night ends.
I could listen to your voice and replay it in my
head all day. I could look at pictures of you
and never look away...

But what I can't do is fathom how it would be
to live my life without you in my thoughts.
What I can't do is rid you from my mind.
You're forever stuck, I'm afraid. And I'll have
to learn to live with the pain of having you

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