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The PMS diaries
That time of month when you want to choke babies and puppies and karate kick everyone you see.
Anxiety takes over and rules your mind, making everything feel longer then it should.
This is known to man as the second dangerous thing in the world maybe even the first.
Why are woman’s hormones so dangerous you ask? Well wouldn’t you be afraid of a creature that can bleed for seven days straight at a time, once a month but still live?
My mouth is worse then a sailors and truck drivers put together.
My mind is worse then a homicidal tiger.
It’s the time to binge on everything in the fridge, cabinet, pantry, and grocery store
Pimples rise on my face at the speed of light, my hairs greasy it’s not the best site.
My heart feels colder then ice.
My soul feels colder then Alaska
I can’t stand the thought of those filthy creatures with testosterone.
Around this time they all better be out of my zone.
I feel like I should wear a warning sign on my head.
I wish I could just spend my life in bed.
I want chocolates and cake and cookies and pretty much anything that comes to mind.
Being a girl is a curse and a blessing apparently.