Unwelcomed Emotions

June 22, 2011
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In and out, out and in
These feelings for you
Come and go again and again
It’s seemingly never-ending
Yet, I can’t recall how it all began
You’re neither an enemy, nor a friend
Just unwelcomed emotions

What do these feelings really mean?
Out-right rejection or a humble acceptance?

Honestly, I’m confused to say
I’ve never felt in such a way
There are moments with you that I wish would never end
Then there are moments when I question
What if?
Or is this really happening?
But I’m so sorry for my hesitation,
I’m sorry for my unwelcomed emotions

So, what happens next?
Do we keep steady?
Or are you calling quits?

Tears welled in my eyes
Streaming to the beating beyond my chest
My limbs are shaking with beads of sweat
Questions toppling in my head;
Should I strive for an “us”?
Or should I just dismiss it instead?

Yet, in the midst of such confusion
My faith takes a stand
Its suprising, but I refuse to deny the MAN
He’s the One and He already has my hand
So, why settle for less?
Why straddle the fence?
To chance my heart, when it’s already cherished
And forever, greatfully taken
I would be mistakened

I can’t say you’re not the “guy”
I can’t say it’s easy to wave good-bye
I can’t say that we won’t speak again
I can’t say that we could be the slightest friends
But neither can I live with these unwelcomed emotions
And for that, I don’t apologize
Cause He hasn’t graced this time
So to keep steady would be determined by my mind
Which is not my own,
Being alternately wrong
So Mr. Guy, I’m gonna say, “No.”
I can’t strive for a steady “us”
To await what may be “next”
And I most certainly don’t blame you
But these unwelcome emotions, I certainly refuse
Therefore, these feeling can’t continue

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