We hurt in order to Grow

June 2, 2011
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We hurt in order to grow.
We prosper in order to know.
Heart breaks happen.
Deaths begin; don’t fret it wont happen to you they say.
Lifes beautiful they say.
Pain isn’t here everyday they say.
This world wont wash away they say.
I feel like the definition of affliction.
I feel this pain, and it doesn’t wash away. I feel it deep inside it eats away what life I have left.
A broken home a lost life, no friends to stay by my side.
A broken world is all that I see through the eyes that I have to unfortunately call mine.
Im lost, im lonely all I want is somebody to love me.
They all said, don’t worry kid life’s going to be okay.
Look where I stand today, since I was born my life has been this way.
Its not changing, they tell me it’s my attitude, they blame it on my appearance.
I hear them snicker behind closed doors, those w*****.
Im here, im standing im breathing im breaking I feel this aching.
With every breath im taking, I crash down below the surface of desolation.
Im craving this, but running at the same time.
Will I find what I need. Or is this destiny.
I cant be who id like to be. Id scare society.
Don’t worry they said, life’s a maze it gets better in days.
I sit here replaying lie after lie that ive heard.
This is my life, it’s the only thing that they haven’t take control of yet.
They scream to me that im unlike the others. They think I don’t see it for myself.
I need this time, this time to find me within.
I thought I could trust you, and all you did was use me.
You know my open arms all to well,
You need to leave be gone with me.
For I am losing myself. And I wont have this state of mind. Not ever again
Depression is the mission in my heart.
To stomp out all signs of faith of hope, the enlightenment will make me choke.
Im left alone and its all your fault, I thought I could trust you with my heart and you riped it piece by piece.
I drownd in my sorrow, and your still here, you say you’re sorry you want more.
Another chance and all I have is hope.
But I cant, begin to stay here its not like I thought it would be.
Im losing all I want all I need to be. Im living in this life, this world
Where do you live? You don’t know of such pain, you think lifes a game?
Lifes a cruel b**** looking to hurt anyone who has their guard down to bad that’s me.
I gotta build this up, I gotta have the will to leave you.
The only thing im losing is myself.
Nothing else, not a love that we never had. Or a dream to be the one who held your hand alongside your body.
That’s not me, never was. Inside I knew I always thought if I made it through it could work.
Face it im a lost cause, I have oh so many flaws.
I cant be loved I cant love.
You cry for me to set you free, but I keep you trapped under my wings, my wings of thorns.
That’s the best i can do. We ended with a thousand words left to say.
But the point is here, you did this you tore apart what we had not me.
I was on your side I had you in the dark I had you in the light.
I was the one who was left out in the cold.
I was the one who got ditched like the latest fashion.
Whats worse than this?
Nothing, I cant stay here, and be told im nothing compared to you.
Compared to you, im the Man.
And youre the mouse.
You cant ever tell me how to feel.
You cant tell me you love me, because
At the end of the day im here and youre not.
Youre the one whose not yourself anymore, so go and find the one who thinks it cool to be gone who thinks its cool to have fun.
While your tearing your body, into the nothings of hells pit.
Have fun, don’t come back to me.
Im done with you im done with your stupid game
Your dumb promises your lies, that you told me daily.
You feel that don’t you?
The earth just caught fire.
I saved my life today.
You’re the one whose sorry now, aren’t you.
To bad im already gone.

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Lauren826 said...
Jul. 23, 2011 at 10:07 pm
Comment please!(:
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