3.8.11

May 22, 2011
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Where do I start?
Left to pick up the fragments once more of this
Broken china doll,
Feed me your porcelain tears,
Bitter and full of sorrow
They've carved out my mouth,
Left me bleeding and speechless one more time.

So many words to drown myself in
All you left behind
You must've discovered my insufficiency
Noticed the limp which I walked
In behalf of this splintered worth,
I told you to wear gloves but you insisted
No protection.

You caught me
Drinking my tears for water only to get by
What else is left? Not enough to contrive a smile,
Nowhere to rest my head
And I'll risk anything at this point
To simply not care anymore.

How much I wish to loathe you!
The vertigo of letting go
Is eating through all my vital organs
Anything but painless,
The strength to breathe is all I have
A reason to live is all I want.

And so where do I start?
To stop loving you,
Broken china doll that we are
The pieces in my palm, cutting into my skin
You may be gone but represent so much
I'm so unwilling to give it up
But to love means to let go....

So you will walk away from me
But I'll be standing still
Bleeding, fighting, screaming but surviving
Living throughout these
Beautiful, painful memories.





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