The Words I Cannot Speak Aloud

May 10, 2011
I don’t want to talk
I don’t want to explain
I don’t want to speak
Speak of my pain
You don’t listen anyway
You close the door to what I’m about to say
You care more about her
And that’s fine
Because I don’t care about you
You aren’t my family
You aren’t what my birth certificate
Writes you out to be
You aren’t in my life
Because I want you to be
You are in my life
Because I am forced to see you
And to bear your actions
That sometimes slice me to the core
Don’t force me to talk
As if I’m your filthy slave
Don’t force me to relive
What I am just starting to get over
I am not your puppet
You don’t control the strings
Of my life
Of who I am
I’m sorry
I can’t be your kind of perfect
You’ll never approve
Of what I do
You say you don’t want me to be
But yet you try to control me
And who I am
But I won’t let you
That’s where it starts
The screaming
The yelling
The tears falling from my cheeks
You don’t care
I am a leaf blowing in the wind compared to your tornado
You just keep yelling
You don’t stop to notice
Because you just want to yell
You don’t apologize
Of course
There’s nothing wrong with you
It’s me
It’s always me
It’s always my fault
No matter what happens
I’m sorry I can’t be your kind of perfect
But I seem to be
Just right
For me

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This article has 2 comments. Post your own now!

Ellie.M. said...
Jun. 16, 2011 at 4:31 pm

this is utterly amazing

so powerful! ♥

GraceMarie replied...
Jul. 16, 2011 at 11:55 pm
Thank you.
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