Changed by a Gift

May 10, 2011
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Sometimes I wonder why people act the way they do.
What had happened to make them this way?
Why do they hate on people or be too scared to even talk.
I know that I am one of the many who have been hurt.
Who have been scarred for the rest of their lives.

But I want to help the ones who are hurting.
I don’t want them to feel the pain as I have.
I want them to be able to recover from what had happened.
To be happy again.

I believe that everybody has a talent, a gift.
They just haven’t found it yet.
I want to help those people find it,
And to be able to blossom from it.
I know I have found mine.

I don’t worry about what people think.
I just go out there and do what’s got to be done.
I want people to be able to do the same.
To be able to show off their gift.

I wasn’t who I am now.
I was one of those people who kept to themselves.
I didn’t talk, didn’t make friends, and didn’t do much of anything for I was scared.
I was an outcast.

Everyone made fun of me.
Of how I dressed or acted.
How I would daydream and read in the middle of class.
How they thought I was a boy.

If only they knew.
If only they had stopped to ask,
“Hey what’s wrong” or “Why do you act this way”
But no one had.

At night I can’t sleep for the nightmares that might come.
That I have to have a pocket knife beside my head, ready to use.
I hate having to do this every day.
How I just deal with it and walk away.

I don’t like going to the counselors,
For it made me feel as if something was wrong with me.
I didn’t have any friends to come to talk to.
I couldn’t with my family.
So I just kept it bottled inside.

I don’t like having people feel sorry for me.
Why say it when it’s not your fault?
When there’s nothing you can do about it?
It makes me feel wrong.

It wasn’t until I was saved when I discovered my gift.
Now when I need to escape I write.
Since I couldn’t talk to anyone it was the only way to get my emotions out.
It was like having a personal friend inside my pocket at all times.

A week later I found my ideal sister.
She is the only one I can laugh with and goof off with.
She’s the only one I come to talk to now for I can trust her with anything.
And for that I love her like a sister.

A few months later I fell in love.
I could talk to him for hours.
And I had so many great times with him.
Even though we’ve gone our separate ways.
He will always be my best friend

At the same time I discovered my second family.
This family is so full of love and happiness.
That every time I think about them I can’t stop myself from smiling.
And I thank them for welcoming me and being there for me.

I have gained more friends.
And opened up more.
Finally enough to be comfortable to even wear girl clothes.
Now every time I look in the mirror I see a different person.

I have changed so much.
From this quiet outcast to a beautiful young woman.
But I couldn’t do it by myself
For I had God and others to remind me that you’re not the only one.
“Don’t forget, there is always someone out there who will love your gift. No matter what kind it is. Whether it’s drawing, singing, dancing, writing or playing an instrument. Even our personalities can be a work of art sometimes. Someone is bound to love it.”





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