Epiphany | Teen Ink

Epiphany

April 14, 2011
By Anonymous

I want to die
No it isn't because my life sucks
Even though by some definition it probably does

It is because of you
But don't take it that way
I wanna die with you
Right here right now

Before we lose anymore innocence
Before you show me you're anything but trustworthy
And before I learn you're anything but perfect
Before you can fall in love with someone else who isn't me
And before you have the chance to break my heart

Because I know you better than you think
And I understand better than anyone else that when you do something
G****** you do it well
So when you break my heart you'll shatter it
And when you kick me when I'm down you'll cripple me for life
And I really don't want to hate myself for loving you anymore than I already do

Because it's pathetic
The way I look at anything and everything reminds me of you
The way I can't eat or sleep or smile of just be happy
Unless you're there
You've got this sick, sick control over me and I don't like it but I need it
Because I need you more than anything
And you have no idea how badly I don't want to

Because if I do that
I surrender and I don't want to give up control
Because when you say jump I'll say how high
And I'm not some kind of puppet over here
But for some reason I can't help but let you pull my strings
And I just wish there was a way to cut myself loose
But I can't I just get tangled and strangled in a mess of wires

But I don't want that, any of that
I just want you
I just want to know this
I just want to die with you
Slit my wrists and have you hold me
And I don't care how long it takes for me to bleed out
Because I'll be in your arms


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