I’m so afraid to fail.

It makes everything harder.

Failure is freedom. Failure is about learning your limits. Accepting them. Learning to live with them. I have limits but I refuse to acknowledge them. I refuse to acknowledge that it is not possible that I could be superwoman. That I’m not strong enough to lift that table. Not tall enough to reach that shelf. Not smart enough to get that grade. So I laugh, I joke, I shrug it off. And then, at night, alone, I cower. I cower alone in my room. I tell myself the lies are true. I tell myself I can do whatever I want to do. If I don’t try, though, I don’t have to be told no. I’m very strategic that way. I never ask yes or no questions, to eliminate the no. I don’t ask questions at all, if I can help it. But I get corrected. I get corrected all day and every day and all night and every night. Because I didn’t know, and I didn’t ask. But I will never learn. I will never ask. Because I’m afraid of no. Because I’m afraid of failure.