I miss the way you made me feel
I miss the way you surprised me
I miss the way you would push me into the lake
just to jump in after me to kiss me
I miss the uncertainty you put in my life
I miss the way you would kiss me
at random times and make me feel alive
But what i don't miss is how you hurt me
How you made me cry
How you made me angry at you
How you made me want to kill you
How you lied to me
and how i cant get you out of my head
How you can let me forget about you
only to make me remember you again
How at times i hate and love you at the same time
How you make me cry myself to sleep at night
And now i go through what ifs about you and me
And now i don't know what to do
other than think that i was actually in love with you
And now how i like a guy
That i have liked for over a year
and cant tell him because
i am afraid he will hurt me too like you did
Know i am afraid all i will ever do is like guys who
want to use me like you did to me
And now i don't know if i hate you or not
So now what am i to do?