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Meltaway Blues This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

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Fingers tap impatiently at a windowsill,
Lacquered nails clipping against the pane
Like staccato bullets.
Wet blue eyes widen and dilate and repeat,
Staring out into the grey streets like searchlights,
Expectant beacons grazing dead fields,
Orbs framed in black ink and ice-blue powder,
Frosty remnants of seasons before.
Toes peek seductively out of canvas and leather,
Little cherry-red-petal-pink nibs
Waiting for the kiss of a cool air
And the prick of yellowed grass.
White knees, freshly shorn
From their dark winter coat,
Pulled up tight to meet a sunscreen slick chin.
She waits, has been waiting, patiently and attentively,
A china doll in a shop window,
A pin-up in a magazine,
Only she's just a girl in a windowsill,
Dressed for sunny skies but trapped in a sparkling winter glaze.
She longs for the burn of the sun,
The sizzle of heat and crackle of drought.
She wants to be ravished by the ocean,
Soaked in salt and sand and sunshine.
But she only sees the grey, the nothing,
The saturated, shredded, silky-cold grass,
The succulent layers of rich, slippery soil,
The water-filled cracks teeming with decay.
If only she could stretch out on the fade,
Roll her body in the moist earth,
Cover herself with the filth of nature
And will away all of the wintry clean,
The sparkling sharp freshness of a deep freeze.
She desires to coat her filmy attire with black
And sit on her knees, soaking up the recent past
And everything that was draining away.
But instead, she sits in the window,
Milky fist brushing away stubborn tears
As she dreams of what can be found
Underneath the melted waters,
Behind the dew-specked plants,
Beyond the curved glass of a toy-shop snow globe
That had been sitting too long on the shelf.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.




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This article has 15 comments. Post your own!

B. said...
Aug. 17, 2012 at 10:17 pm:
Beautiful word flow and perfectly painted picture. I love your other works too :D Thanks so much for your comment by the way. Keep writing!
 
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ErisRose said...
Dec. 20, 2011 at 5:58 pm:
This poem is simply beautiful. I love it!!
 
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GangstaEyes This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 3, 2011 at 10:16 am:
Agreed! The descriptivness is so strong and your word choice is perfect- it really paints a picture in my mind! Also, I love the whole message- I feel this way every winter, but I never could have put my feelings to a poem as well as you did :)
 
ohmakemeover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 3, 2011 at 12:57 pm :
Oh, I bet you could if you tried!  Thanks for the feedback...you're too sweet!
 
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JerseyGirl716 said...
Aug. 2, 2011 at 7:25 pm:
I agree with everyone, I thought the descriptions made the poem special. I usually hate poems that are this long, but I loved yours! You held my attention the whole time, great job!
 
ohmakemeover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 2, 2011 at 7:33 pm :
Thanks so much!  I'm glad you gave it a chance.
 
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redhairCat This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 31, 2011 at 2:26 pm:
You did a great job with the descriptions!
 
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ritabelle511 said...
Jul. 29, 2011 at 11:11 am:
I didn't think you were heavy on the descriptors - I thought they were fantastic! My favorite was "the saturated, shredded, silky-cold grass, The succulent layers of rich, slippery soil" - its just so excellently worded.  You are an extremely talented writer!
 
ohmakemeover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jul. 29, 2011 at 12:52 pm :
Thank you so much!  I tend to use a lot of alliteration too haha.
 
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leafyThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 26, 2011 at 9:16 pm:
i really liked the adjectives you used, like "cherry-red-petal-pink" and "dew-specked," very creative. keep up the nice work! 5/5
 
ohmakemeover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jul. 26, 2011 at 10:14 pm :
Thank you!  I tend to be a little heavy on the descriptors, but I'm glad you liked it!
 
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Hazel-daisy This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 25, 2011 at 7:39 pm:
honestly i dont think i can find a single fault with it! and i agree, the imagery is fantastic! well done! :)
 
samiasaskia24 replied...
Jul. 26, 2011 at 1:15 pm :
Jusy fantastic! Nothing els to say!
 
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Destinee This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 5, 2011 at 3:34 pm:
This was amazing! I loved the imagery, the words are just delectable, arghh it's so good!
 
ohmakemeover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
May 5, 2011 at 5:19 pm :
Wow, thank you so much!  I'm glad you like it!
 
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