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Why did I love him so?

I wait at the stairs for you
You look at me with those eyes
and I embrace everything I love about you inside

I sit down beside
a man I seem to like
But all think about
is sitting beside two completely different men
with two completely different attitudes
how they held me close
why did I love him so?

Wearing the white dress, crimson lipstick
I care about each of you
Please don’t make me choose
between two men whose love I may never know again
for a reason I ruined it
Don’t say I left you behind

Don’t say Don’t go back to him
I know that you are better for me
Why does first love make me tick?
Sending me crawling back to him
I did love him so
I put on the white dress for him
but kissed your lips with the red lipstick
He knows I would choose you
if you wanted me too
You think I would run to him
He put a diamond ring in a little black box
I said I would marry him
I loved him longer
Why did I love him so?

All I remember is arguing not discussing
I remember affection and care
But I remember how he dove at me
gripped me to the ground
Many nights I spent
not telling him where I was
Crying uncontrollably as he said he would leave me
Why did I love him so?
If our thoughts didn’t match up and our minds were not connected
Could we raise a child, with conflicting views woven in
Could we spend hours talking and agree that our life goals are the same
Would I put on the white dress
kiss you at the bottom of the staircase
saying I’d rather be with him
even though you fit perfectly with me

He said we were supposed to be together
You said we were supposed to be together
Who should I listen to?
Don’t say we might be meant to be




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