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Asthma

Asthma
Air.
It is vital. I used to take it for granted,
And the way my body works
Involuntarily
Lungs rising up, down, up down
All until
Suddenly
I was temporarily stripped of the privilege
of breathing.
It is very scary
To inhale
And find that there is nothing there.
Well, of course the air is still
THERE,
But my lungs have crumpled,
Like twin tin cans,
Out of order.
As the world spins farther out of my grasp,
And my hands, now cool and sweaty, clench like crab claws,
I want to remind you
How beautiful it is
To be able to take
A deep breath
Without having
To try.




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This article has 30 comments. Post your own!

Shmelmo said...
May 3, 2011 at 11:16 am:
This is a really good poem that I can relate to! Keep writing!
 
bieberl0ve15 replied...
May 9, 2011 at 3:52 pm :
Shmelmo- Thanks so much! 
 
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chitchatwolf said...
Apr. 28, 2011 at 6:10 pm:

Great job! I think out of all the ones you have shared , this is the besr

-rachel

 
bieberl0ve15 replied...
Apr. 28, 2011 at 9:58 pm :
thanks rachel! :)
 
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ExpRESsY0uRselF said...
Apr. 28, 2011 at 5:49 pm:
Wow, this poem was epic! I loved it so much! BTW, thanks for checking out my work! Keep on writing bieberl0ve15! you're amazing at it!
 
bieberl0ve15 replied...
Apr. 28, 2011 at 9:58 pm :
aww thank you:)
 
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jbiebsismyman said...
Apr. 28, 2011 at 2:36 pm:

i absolutely love this poem!! its amazing!!!!! its reallly dramatic :)

-Julia Madsen, HAS

 
bieberl0ve15 replied...
Apr. 28, 2011 at 4:14 pm :
Aww thank you! :) :)
 
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jdbislyfe333 said...
Apr. 26, 2011 at 5:54 pm:

hey elyse! ur poem is amazing. i love how u space out the sentense to make it more intense :)

~Christina

 
bieberl0ve15 replied...
Apr. 26, 2011 at 6:47 pm :
Haha hey! And thanks so much :)
 
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bieberl0ve15 said...
Apr. 25, 2011 at 1:20 pm:
If you read this, PLEASE comment/rate my poem! I would love your feedback :)
 
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