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Darkest December

I'm lying here on this cold stone.
The numbness cuts straight through the bone.
My heart is throbbing in my chest.
You always knew how to hurt me best.
The rain is pounding, soaking me through.
I wish I never had anything to do with you.
My muscles are stiff and my sobs are hushed.
You made sure that my dreams were crushed.
I'm not sure if I'll be able to survive.
I'm so dead inside, I'm not sure how I'm alive.
It's hard for me to breathe out here.
It's hard when you're gone, but it's fatal when you're near.
I had to get out, run away, but fell.
now I'm, stuck on the ground, even closer to hell.
I wish the pain woud slack,
but it grows more pronounced as the tears fail to lack.
The days burn into night, and I'm still crying.
Time caeses to exist when you're dying.
And that's what I'm doing; I'm dying inside.
In my lifeless world, I'm trapped behind.
The sharp knife cuts through the skin.
Loving you was the hardest sin.
It's cold in this place and I can't quite remember
why its so miserable and dark in December.
How do I move on from such a lifeless world?
I have to forget about you and your arms around that girl.
The girl in your embrace who wasn't me.
The girl you say you love; how could it be?
I was foolish to believe such beautiful lies.
The color of black has become my skies.
Sad doesn't begin to cover how I feel.
Glances of you, in my head: I steal.
But you've become a memory, no more in my life.
It was wrong for me to even want to be your wife.
I couldn't see past the short days ahead.
And now I can't see through the haze in my head.
And it's my fault: how I can't seem to forget.
Returning your love was my biggest regret.
And I coulnd't help not running to you.
You were my sun when I was stuck with the moon.
My heart is broken, failing to beat.
I'm cold, but as I think of you, I'm filled with heat.
I love you so much; how could you do this?
I hate you much more; revulsion is strong at your kiss.
I'm sorry I couldn't be rational when it came to you.
I've learned my lesson, and I hope time can be renewed.





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