On so many occasions

I have wondered:

Whats wrong with me?

Many nights I don't have an answer.

Tonight I do:

I'm all used up.

An old bandage

cast aside by those who

will never heal.

I shake and the emptiness

inside me clangs like a ringing bell.

Sounding alarm for when I cave in.

I grieve for the things taken from me.

Things I will never get back.

Now my freedom is locked away,

my happiness right beside it.

I gave and gave

and now I have nothing.

Except my remnants

and collapsed life.

You stole the key

to my treasures locked away.




My hands used to dance.

They used to tell stories

of white dresses and lace, unstained.

Now they shake and shudder.

Either balled into fists to ward off

more poachers.

Or supplicant.

Supplicant despite me having nothing left.

Despite the fact that I'm

completely robbed of everything

I continue to give.

It's all I know.

No one taught me to take.

Thats the flaw in the word of god.

God doesn't teach how to seek revenge.

Never tells the secret art of taking back.

So here I am

Empty and suffering

not even afforded the mercy to cry.

I'm left to clutch onto my empty walls.

Left alone to stomp out the remaining embers of my soul.

And the gaping hole within me

never to be filled.

I'm just another

person robbed, unredeemed.

A person who gave to much,

and forgot to ask for something in return.

Just another unredemption.