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Life goes on

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Sitting here life goes on nothing but the light shinning in my left eye . I try to look at the bright side tugging is a diff cult thing to overcome as pain and everything goes crazy in your mind bothering you and people letting you down and you taking a stand to stand up for what is right . I wonder sometimes what would it take to be in good hands of an achieving life, struggle is trying to prepare for life at the same time keeping up with what goes on in life , is like trying to teach a baby how to ride a bike it takes time to be on top and if you fall you can be down in seconds before the minute hand hits the main dot .



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Black_Rose_Princess said...
Jul. 12, 2012 at 3:28 am
Again, really interesting. I liked the ending; the wording was really good. It seemed rushed, but I think that works for your advantage since you are saying life keeps going on. One thing sticks out: why only the left eye? It seems like too much detail.
 
DanielM said...
Jun. 28, 2012 at 8:15 am
I really liked this poem. The emotion and message we're really good. I liked the phrase about the minute hand the ending stanzas we're really good. Great job!!! Suggestion is maybe you have a few misspelled words. Other than that good job
 
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