To the (E)x

March 15, 2011
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With your disgusting yellow teeth,
and your scruffy beard,
you look like a big brown bear just out of hibernation.
I could never get past your dirty, holey clothes.
They were so vile that they practically crawled across the floor.
Your vulgar odor gave my nose ulcers,
and all those colognes I bought you didn’t go to good use.
You my dear were a true piece of work.
You were rude when you smacked your lips together while you ate,
and you had disgusting habits like chewing.
No hunny I don’t mean the gum you chewed.
I mean the nasty spearmint chew you used to chew.
The taste of it on your lips made me want to heave ho.
I’m full of sorrow for wasting my life on you.
I’m so sorry I led you on puppy dog.

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