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Give It All To Me

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Broken and beat down I stood before Him.

“Save me” I muttered.
“I’ve been trying.” He tells me
“But your wall you put up has not only kept you in, but has kept everyone out. Everyone includes me.”
I never meant to keep Him out.
I just couldn’t handle it anymore: the pain, the distrust, the lies, the broken heart.
Every time I got close, I got hurt.
“God, how do I do it?”
“Simply by remembering who you are.”
I know who I am. I am the fat, ugly person everyone sees.
I am untrustworthy. I am worthless. I am unwanted. I am….
“I can read your thoughts, My child. Do you not know that?”
“Lord, what do you mean ‘who I am’?”
“You are my daughter. I created you. I made you. In My image. If you are ugly then what does that make me?”
I feel my knees hit the cold, hard floor. The wetness on my jeans must be my own tears. That’s all I can take. I’ve hit bottom. “How could I?” I cry out. How? Why?
“God, you are my everything. I never meant to call you ugly. I know you love me.”
“I know, My daughter. I know. Do you remember now that you are amazing? Why would I make something terrible? Unlovable? Garbage?”
He’s right. He wouldn’t.
“Why does everyone You create have to hurt me?”
“They don’t.”
He can’t fully get it.
I didn’t put up this wall for protection. It’s a challenge. Who loves me enough to tear it down? So far, no one.
“I do.”
I hear His deep, reassuring voice again.
“What?”
“Daughter, I love you enough. I’ll knock it down. I care. I want it gone.”
“It can’t really be that easy.”
“Oh it is. Just give it all to Me.”



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