I Wonder?....

When I looked into the cold morning fog, I noticed a sliver of hope in the existence of the smile upon the young boy’s face.
He was full of life, while I only wanted death. He was so innocent, pure, and full of Love. As he climbed into the family automobile on his way to school, I could only wish that I was his age again. I wished I was so young once again. Life was mine to take. I know so much about the world now; I know so little about the world. While my wet, cold hair attracted the frost from the air, I began to daydream. I was in the world full of smiles, laughs, and happiness. I was in a utopia. I had no reason to complain. I ran and ran and ran until my lungs were begging and gasping for air. I gave them a second to catch their breath, and laughing so loud, I began to run and play more and more. Listening to nothing that I didn’t want to hear, doing nothing that I didn’t think was right, saying anything that was on my mind, and with no regret. The world, as we know it, has yet to capture me in her money, fame, and material trap. I had yet to conform. I had yet to be molded into her image. I had yet to let myself become another ordinary person. I was Me, and that is all I needed to be. Suddenly, the frost began to settle on the tips of my curled hair and my ears were purple. I realized I had been standing there for twenty minutes. I was late to school, my car was dead, and I felt helpless. My hands were bound with rope made of green and gold. It became clear that I was lost. I was hopeless and my life was not my life anymore. My life wasn’t special, it was no longer genuine. I wonder how it came to be this way. I wonder how long it has been this way. I wonder how long it will last. I wonder?….





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