Even Though (Cold Turkey)

My body still wants you,
Even though I tell it not to.


My stomach still drops every time I see you…
Even though it’s only a glimpse in a crowded hallway,
And I’ve been bracing myself for this
Since I left my last class.


My lips still feel like kissing yours;
Still feel like sneaking a peck before practice…
Even though they know that
They’re not allowed to do that;
Not anymore.


My hands still long to feel yours around them
Even though I bought them some white mittens
To keep them warm
Instead.


My eyes still automatically search for your car in the parking lot;
That little silver Toyota that I’d come to depend on,
Halfway down the second row…
Even though they know that
I won’t be getting anymore rides in it.


My hopes still rise every time I get a new text
Wondering if you’ve changed your mind
Even though I tell myself that
I don’t want to talk to you;
Not anymore.


My heart can still picture you
Loving me back
The way you did
(Only a few weeks ago)
Even though it knows
That you
Don’t.

My body still wants you
Even though I tell it not to.