My Tourniquet

January 5, 2011
By Anonymous

Shrouded in the darkness of my past
The walls around me crumbling fast
The remainder of my strength slowly ebbs
Fighting my way through these tangled webs
Shadows surround me, shoving me down
I cling to what's left as I fall to the ground
On my knees,clutching my sides
I feel my will decrease in size
I wonder what is good in this world
Into which I have been hurled
All that I see is dark and corrupt
As anger and hatred rise to erupt
The fire lights deep in my eyes
What's left within me gradually dies
I ascend from the ground made anew
Embracing the darkness was the only way through
Like a glorious phoenix, I rose from the ash
But the new and the old now begin to clash
I take a step forward, only to fall back
What is it that I seem to lack?
I have to embrace the darkness
In order to protect my weakness
Clouding and crowding my mind
I must leave myself behind
The only way to survive
I have to die, to stay alive
I let the flames rage within me
Thriving and thrashing internally
It isn't my fault, I'm not to blamed
But those who are..they should be ashamed
They've caused me to retreat into a self-built shell
Solely creating my own personal Hell
It's an unfair hand, the one I was dealt
But self pity is no emotion I've felt
You will not see me fall again
To no one or anything will I bend
I have been scarred one too many times
To risk enduring anymore of these crimes

I wonder what is good in this world
Into which I have been hurled
For when I needed you most, you fled.
And denied me of my tourniquet.

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